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Butterfliesyou are like stars and butterflies
you shine so brightly by moonlight
as if you are a f r a i d
of falling f a l l i n g down into rabbit holes
[never fear darling i won't let go]
you flutter by my soul
you shudder as if i am too b r i g h t
as if i will blind you if you fly too close
and when i reach out
air breaks ever so softly as
you d i s a p p e a r
one day i will capture you in cupped hands
Burni will hold the candle and its flame
upwards for the moment when you realize
i have yet to disappear
i will breathe into your lungs
so inhale sharply and let your eyes snap open
i'll exhale my soul into your body
so these old husks we carry around upon our backs
will have their use again
b u r n b u r n b u r n b u r n
i will hold myself steady right here just for
Hauntingthree years fifteen hours nine minutes and fourteen seconds ago
destroyed the foundations you left
b e h i n d
i still don't breathe easier at night
lying curled upon his chest
ear pressed tight against the flesh and bone
trying to relax [but i feel it clawing its way up the back of my throat]
it's been so long ago but
y o u r g h o s t
Eventually We All Breaki've been counting minutes that slide into days
endless like when i thought summer would stay behind
but, like everything
the love slowly slips away until barren trees are left behind
frozen away until the thaw
i stand at the crossroads waiting for you
to make your decision [make it make it make your decision baby]
because i don't want to be left hanging onto nothing
letting my heart be toyed with until you grow bored
oh no, i won't stay if i'll end up burned
tick tick tick tick
Crystallizei want to be the ocean
i want to drown in the silent blue
let her swallow my salty tears and
bring me to life beneath the waves
let my eyes and heart crystallize
i want to raise my arms above
feel the iciness bite into my wrists and ankles
'i love you'
i hear his voice echoing in the darkness
questioning whose eyes he stared into
as he spoke those soul breaking words
drown my sorrows baby
drown my heart
let my soul break into millions of pieces
i'll forget to pick up each jagged shard
forget to put myself back together
the drip drip drip
tick tick tick
becoming like a symphony
tremors break across her spine
she perks up
and leans forward quickly
hoping today is the day
a family gallops past
'No' she thinks
heart sinking just as quickly
as a balloon deflates
she goes back to cowering
ignoring the giggles and shouts coming
from two spaces to her left
'when will i have a family?
will i ever find a home?'
she thinks sadly
'this life, in a cage,
i do not want to be here forever
when will i go home?''
she lays, belly down
sadness playing in her eyes
Golden Eyeshe sits
golden eyes staring at the still shape
patient, she lurks
just until that one moment until
the time is just right
i place the can on the counter top
all my weapons of choice lying next to the plate
i know she stares, waiting patiently, silently
i crack open the top, the smell wafting around me for a few seconds
i grimace and scoop it onto the plate
and i can imagine her licking her whiskers
intently waiting for the moment the plate connects
with the concrete
bells twinkle in sudden succession
and claws dig into flooring
as she skids into the plate
knocking over the water bowl
and a quick rush of water floods my feet
BlueI watch you sleeping
clinging to the blue stuffed elephant you claimed
and have run through the dirt and mud fields
smeared its trunk through jelly ponds and
took him to bathe in the tub one night
and i watch your chest rise and fall
your life is just so perfect
your fingers curl in your sleep
reaching out gently i place my finger into your palm
and i can hear my heart one day breaking
for you will grow and move onward
to a family of your own
i remove your elephant without waking you
tonight i shall stay up late
Strong i am shrouded in sin
but these hips will carry your chubby legs and bottom
until one day you grow just old enough to start running
and i shall be chasing, forever chasing, your shadows
telling you to hold our hands and not to go running off
these hands will be made to withstand the rain of your tears
when your heart breaks silently or
your knees are scraped on concrete steps
because that is a part of growing up
my back and shoulders will carry both you and your burdens
until one day you will be strong enough to do so on your own
So I heard you wanted to make them like you?So I heard you had someone in mind
Perhaps something more intimate and
So I heard you wanted him to like you,
And I heard you didn't know what to do.
And so I heard you wanted a friend.
Or maybe just one..
And I heard from you, that you want me to like you too
but how, you ask?
you don't need to try.
I mean I heard you wanted to make them like
Wondering how getting the attention of that special someone works?
or perhaps just the friend, you know.
I'm no somebody and preferably just a nobody but
I heard you wanted someone to like you.
So be You.
BeautyI'd rather wear flowers in my hair,
forming a delicate chain
Than diamonds around my neck,
covering my tender blue veins
For with every precious petal
and every lucent leaf
I'm a living lesson
teaching beauty can not be bought
But rather it grows and flourishes
with every living thought
Expensive LiesI sit and stare at the toilet bowl.
A guy I know is bulimic.
When we compliment him
I see the twist of agony in his eyes
as his brain reprograms it
to sound like an expensive lie
that costs him another tear
in his tattered dignity.
Friends hurry to him,
to reassure him, to love him.
They tell him how beautiful he is.
We didn't know him before,
but he's definitely not fat now.
We whisper things in concern like;
body dysmorphic disorder.
'I know you'll never believe me
but you are so gorgeous -
not just on the inside.' Not just.
And they're right, I join in,
because they are right to say it
because it happens to be true -
he is stunning. Not just on the outside.
And we want him to see himself
the way we see him, beautiful.
And I join in because
I've felt that strangle of pain
in my stomach, bowels and belly,
when someone used to tell me lies.
So I know how he feels.
Only, he is beautiful on the outside
and I'm not.
He's not seeing reality in the mirror
and I am.
And people rush to correc
Fearing MeI'm not afraid to cry
and I do it
a lot more than you would guess.
It isn't always sadness,
I just feel like I need to,
feel everything so strongly
that it's the only way
to let go for a moment
because if I hold on for too long,
if my grip gets too tight
I'll break myself,
I will break you like glass
and we will both
I am a good guy
who hasn't yet found a way
to show it,
I am a good guy
who still identifies with the villains,
hides everything important
anything to throw you
off of my trail....
and I don't know why,
but I am trying.
Maybe I think
that if you could see me,
the real me,
you wouldn't want to look anymore,
want to be anywhere near me,
and the idea
that I can't add up
to be enough for you,
to be enough for me,
is so fucking heart breaking
I can hardly fathom it.
I can't say that it doesn't hurt
because it does,
it hurts a whole hell of a lot,
I've come to depend on pain,
to befriend misery
A Kiss not Forgotten (a special tribute)Like a frost spread across valleys silent and dreary,
ever my longing lost in shimmers of shadow & wind
And days bled into years, the seas became deserts
But thoughts of thee would not perish
Thru memories untamed I staggered far and long;
upon solemn nights lit by the torch of your soul
O’ how deep I miss your fragrant cheer ..
Of warm evenings shared across Lake’s reverie,
watching horizons journey into Autumn’s dream
— wherest our hearts once bloomed a fabled sky
Those passions shared will forsake me not
Lest the Moon would bestow solace upon my ache:
I will lay marooned, haunted by thy seraphic-figure,
Or the ever fleeting caress of your gaze ...
So my soul shall yield to this mythic abyss; –
as I peer from my carriage to Nirvana
And thou away, from my arms, the Sun weeps
Unto eternity—my dear beloved, we are entwined
Forever our footprints cast in golden firmament
A kiss not forgotten in a ballet of light softly falling
I now bear the want
you're just a question marki met you so long ago
but back then our bodies were made of metal
and nowadays they’re made of the blades of
grass and dirt settling
underneath my fingernails.
my fingers are having a hard time
reaching the keys and
my organs are shaking mostly because i haven’t
eaten in two days but also
because i’m worried about the things you're doing to yourself.
we didn’t meet very long ago at all but it feels like forever ago
and you say you don’t know me
that you don’t know anyone
but baby you're turning into a skeleton and i’m peeling back my skin
to try and reach my bones, just like you.
i hope you're happy,
i’m covering the hard wood floors now
the bits and pieces splattered.
they are calling it a suicide but i’m calling it
a way to see my brain and
just how dark it has become, and honestly
i don’t want you to try and see about your’s.
i’m mourning the loss of my heart and wish you weren’t either -
Black hole BulimicThe Composition:
I birth poems — not amaranths
in graveyards — not gardens.
sows seeds of doubt
into skeleton weeds.
A farmer plucks the bones
from Apollo's hyacinth; his
I binge on broken
cracked collectors of rocks,
of pebbles kidnapped
from barren beaches:
where crooked kings
buried in books whose
pages creak to crickets
in an abandoned abyss
of an attic—caskets on
an antiquated shelf. I
choke on the dust and
twitch in recoil.
The bickering sky
A cloud coughs—
The clock's scythe hand
swivels to the beckoning
twelve. Spastic ticking—
each bleak stroke
of a midnight heart.
The sundials do not work
now. The vampires know
I kill poems—
obligation steam machineas always
grinding the cankerous
of your cognition
until the lack of compassion
leaves you unlubricated
seized frozen bound stuck
only then the machine of
your fears will burst to steam
squealing to suckle
at the genius of my
the unsung soiled hero
of middle-class ferocity
savior of the undeserving
winding slowly deftly dying
martyr to the self-justified cause
as love for summer fades.late morning-
there's the tease of
snow in the clouds,
in the air, and the trees
have finally lost their
the sunlight is damp.
alters the room
as it graces my skin,
and for once
i don't wake up right away.
instead i lay
between my memory bitten
sheets, and i think
about all the times he said
that he hated winter.
i don't remember
when i began to love it,
and i don't care.
nothing can shatter that.
Letters to the UnbornMy letters will never be received by you;
you will never be able to hold my hand within yours
nor feel the wind upon your cheeks
touch the reddest roses or
lie snuggled in my arms
you will never know my kisses-
placed upon chubby cheeks
I lost those moments when I let
someone tell me what to do with my body
whisper lies into my weakened ears
in the dead of night I swear that
I'll love him like I would have loved you
[I know he will never replace you]
because in my soul I feel it screaming
as if I have the blood of you on my hands
[but honestly, I do]
you are my darling angel
sent to heaven too early
for my mistake.
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^Nyx-Valentine arrived in our community and started whipping everyone into a frenzy with her relentless desire to bring the Artistic Nude and Fetish galleries to the fore. 9 years later, and it's safe to say that Nyx is not only a leader as a photographer in these galleries, but she has also established herself as a much saught after model. ^... Read More